Venerable newscaster Norm Archer reports the latest news in politics, health, culture and entertainment - such as an automotive recall of decapitation-inducing "Neckbelts" and a study finding that "depression hits losers hardest". This compilation of bogus news stories, celebrity profiles, movie trailers and skits come courtesy of the ace satirists at The Onion.
Norm Archer
Cock Puncher
Dana Dobbs
Sensei
Dennis McCormick
Michael Bolton
Ahmed
White Black Guy Tim
Ivy Leaguer
Cooking Show Chef
Wizard Proteus
Rodney Dangerfield
Peruvian
Typical Neighbor Husband
Kip Kendall
Alzheimers Old Lady
Alzheimers Guy in Crowd
Producer
Producer
Melissa Cherry
Surgeon General
Dibo
Kenneth Garber
The Masses
Rapist Lisa
Rape Victim Julie
Steel Beam Architect
Line-Up Detective
Porn Star
Porn Star
Lollipop Love Dancer
Office Worker
Lollipop Love Dancer
Lollipop Love Dancer
Wigger Jim
Heavy Girl
Announcer
Hippie Diplomant
Bryce Brand
Bryce's Manager
Bates Computer Salesman Dirk
Peen Out Guy
James Nakatami
Gay Guy
Gil Bates
Cockpuncher Entourage
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